It was a copy of a bank statement.
\nAt first, I didn\u2019t understand why Elise had included it.
\nThen I saw the account number.
\nIt belonged to the savings account my father had opened for me years earlier\u2014the account I had told Elise was nearly empty.
\nMy hands went cold.
\nThere were several highlighted withdrawals.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
$2,800.
\n$1,950.
\n$4,300.
\n$6,100.
\nEach one had a date written beside it.
\nAnd beside every date, Elise had written what I had told her the money was for.
\nCar repairs.
\nA work conference.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Emergency expenses.
\nA new laptop.
\nBut underneath those explanations, she had attached receipts showing where the money had actually gone.
\nHotels.
\nRestaurants.
\nJewelry.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Weekend trips.
\nGifts for Corinne.
\nI stared at the pages until the numbers blurred together.
\nI had never thought of myself as stealing from my family.
\nThat word sounded too ugly.
\nToo deliberate.
\nI had always told myself it was my money because I earned most of our income.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
But sitting in that silent kitchen, I finally saw what Elise had seen.
\nEvery dollar I spent pretending to be someone else with Corinne was money I had taken away from the woman recovering from surgery upstairs and the baby sleeping beside her.
\nMy phone rang.
\nI nearly dropped it.
\nCorinne.
\nFor a second, I considered ignoring her.
\nThen I answered.
\n\u201cHey,\u201d she said brightly. \u201cDid you make it home?\u201d
\nI didn\u2019t respond.
\nShe laughed softly.
\n\u201cIs everything okay?\u201d
\n\u201cElise left.\u201d
\nSilence.
\n\u201cWhat do you mean, left?\u201d
\n\u201cShe took Mabel.\u201d
\nAnother pause.
\nThen Corinne said the last thing I expected.
\n\u201cOkay. So\u2026 what happens now?\u201d
\nI looked around the empty kitchen.
\n\u201cWhat happens now?\u201d
\n\u201cWell,\u201d she said carefully, \u201cyou said your marriage was basically over anyway.\u201d
\nI closed my eyes.
\nI had said that.
\nMany times.
\nI had told Corinne that Elise and I barely spoke.
\nThat we were staying together because of the baby.
\nThat divorce was probably inevitable.
\nAll the convenient lies that made an affair sound less cruel.
\n\u201cI didn\u2019t think she would actually leave.\u201d
\nCorinne was quiet.
\nThen she asked, \u201cDoes she know about me?\u201d
\nI looked at the photographs spread across the table.
\n\u201cShe knows everything.\u201d
\n\u201cWhat does that mean?\u201d
\n\u201cShe has pictures. Receipts. Hotel charges. Everything.\u201d
\nCorinne\u2019s voice changed immediately.
\n\u201cPictures?\u201d
\n\u201cYes.\u201d
\n\u201cPictures of me?\u201d
\n\u201cYes.\u201d
\n\u201cOh my God.\u201d
\nSuddenly she wasn\u2019t asking about me.
\nShe was asking whether Elise might contact our employer.
\nWhether anyone at work knew.
\nWhether her name appeared in the divorce papers.
\nWhether the photographs could become public.
\nI listened to her rapid questions and realized something uncomfortable.
\nFor months, I had convinced myself Corinne understood me better than my wife did.
\nBut now that my life was collapsing, Corinne was mostly worried about what my collapse might cost her.
\n\u201cI have to go,\u201d I said.
\n\u201cWait. What are you going to do?\u201d
\n\u201cI don\u2019t know.\u201d
\nI ended the call.
\nThen I called Elise.
\nStraight to voicemail.
\nI called again.
\nVoicemail.
\nI sent a message.
\nPlease tell me Mabel is okay.
\nNo response.
\nI sent another.
\nI know I don\u2019t deserve an explanation, but please let me know you\u2019re both safe.
\nFive minutes passed.
\nTen.
\nTwenty.
\nNothing.
\nThen my phone rang.
\nI grabbed it so quickly I knocked one of the shopping bags onto the floor.
\nBut it wasn\u2019t Elise.
\nIt was a number I didn\u2019t recognize.
\n\u201cMr. Lawson?\u201d
\n\u201cYes?\u201d
\n\u201cThis is Daniel Mercer. I represent your wife.\u201d
\nThe word wife nearly broke something inside me.
\nBecause technically she was still my wife.
\nBut she had already built an entire exit from our marriage without me knowing.
\nMr. Mercer told me Elise and Mabel were safe.
\nRelief hit me so hard I had to sit down.
\nThen he told me not to contact Elise directly for the time being.
\n\u201cAll communication regarding the divorce should come through my office.\u201d
\n\u201cI need to speak to her.\u201d
\n\u201cI understand.\u201d
\n\u201cNo, you don\u2019t. That\u2019s my daughter.\u201d
\n\u201cAnd nobody is preventing you from being her father,\u201d he replied calmly. \u201cBut your wife has requested some space while temporary arrangements are established.\u201d
\nTemporary arrangements.
\nTwo words that made my stomach turn.
\n\u201cWhat arrangements?\u201d
\nThere was a brief silence.
\n\u201cYou should read the entire packet, Mr. Lawson.\u201d
\nI looked down at the papers.
\n\u201cI did.\u201d
\n\u201cNo,\u201d he said. \u201cYou didn\u2019t.\u201d
\nMy eyes moved toward the envelope.
\nThere was another folded sheet still tucked against the bottom.
\nI pulled it out.
\nIt was a proposed temporary parenting agreement.
\nMy name appeared at the top.
\nElise\u2019s below it.
\nAnd suddenly divorce was no longer an abstract threat written on legal paper.
\nThere were schedules.
\nDays.
\nHours.
\nRules.
\nTimes when I could see my own daughter.
\nI felt anger rise inside me.
\n\u201cShe can\u2019t decide when I\u2019m allowed to see Mabel.\u201d
\n\u201cNothing has been finalized,\u201d the attorney said. \u201cThat is a proposal.\u201d
\n\u201cI\u2019m her father.\u201d
\n\u201cYes.\u201d
\n\u201cI have rights.\u201d
\n\u201cYes.\u201d
\n\u201cThen why is she acting like I\u2019m dangerous?\u201d
\n\u201cShe isn\u2019t.\u201d
\n\u201cThen why did she disappear?\u201d
\nThis time his voice became quieter.
\n\u201cMr. Lawson, your wife didn\u2019t disappear today.\u201d
\nI froze.
\n\u201cWhat?\u201d
\n\u201cShe left today.\u201d
\nI gripped the phone tighter.
\n\u201cWhat\u2019s the difference?\u201d
\n\u201cThe difference is that she began preparing months ago.\u201d
\nI looked at the evidence covering the table.
\nApparently, Elise had first contacted him six weeks after Mabel was born.
\nSix weeks.
\nI tried to remember what I had been doing six weeks after my daughter was born.
\nThen I remembered.
\nThat was the weekend I told Elise I had a mandatory training conference.
\nI had actually spent two nights at a hotel with Corinne.
\nI felt sick.
\n\u201cHow long has she known?\u201d
\nThe lawyer paused.
\n\u201cYou should ask your wife that when she is ready to speak with you.\u201d
\nThen he added something I wasn\u2019t prepared for.
\n\u201cBut I think there is another question you should be asking yourself.\u201d
\n\u201cWhat question?\u201d
\n\u201cHow long did you think you could keep doing this before she found out?\u201d
\nAfter the call ended, I remained at the kitchen table.
\nThe diamond bracelet was still inside its velvet box.
\nOne of Corinne\u2019s designer bags had fallen sideways on the floor.
\nI suddenly hated looking at them.
\nI carried every shopping bag into the garage and shoved them into the trunk of my car.
\nThen I went back upstairs.
\nThe nursery was unbearable.
\nI stood beside the crib and remembered the night Mabel was born.
\nElise had been rushed into surgery after hours of complications.
\nI had been terrified.
\nWhen the nurse finally placed our daughter in my arms, I cried harder than I had cried since childhood.
\nI promised Elise I would take care of them.
\nThree months later, I had spent an entire Saturday buying another woman jewelry while my wife cared for our child alone.
\nI sat down on the nursery floor.
\nThat was where Elise\u2019s rocking chair had been.
\nFor the first time that evening, I stopped feeling sorry for myself.
\nBut regret didn\u2019t mean I knew how to fix anything.
\nThe next morning, I returned every gift I could.
\nCorinne called nine times.
\nI ignored all nine.
\nAt noon, she sent a message.
\nWe need to talk before you make decisions you\u2019ll regret.
\nI stared at those words for a long time.
\nThen I deleted them.
\nMonday morning, I went to work early.
\nI planned to tell Corinne that whatever existed between us was finished.
\nBut when I stepped off the elevator, my manager was standing beside my desk.
\nCorinne was nowhere in sight.
\n\u201cCan you come into my office?\u201d he asked.
\nSomething in his expression made my heart sink.
\nInside the conference room were two people from Human Resources.
\nA folder sat on the table.
\nThe HR director motioned for me to sit.
\n\u201cWe received a complaint this morning.\u201d
\nMy mouth went dry.
\n\u201cFrom who?\u201d
\nShe opened the folder.
\n\u201cThe complaint concerns your relationship with Corinne Matthews and possible misuse of company travel expenses.\u201d
\nI stopped breathing.
\nCompany travel expenses.
\nI had forgotten about those.
\nThere had been two hotel stays I charged to the company card after telling accounting they were related to client meetings.
\nOne of them had been with Corinne.
\nThe HR director slid a printed page across the table.
\n\u201cThis was submitted with documentation.\u201d
\nI stared at it.
\nIt was a copy of one of my expense reports.
\nAttached to it was a hotel receipt.
\nMy signature was at the bottom.
\nBut what made my stomach drop wasn\u2019t the receipt.
\nIt was the email printed behind it.
\nAn email I had sent Corinne from my company account months earlier.
\nAnd at the bottom of the page was the name of the person who had forwarded everything to Human Resources.
\nIt wasn\u2019t Elise.
\nIt was Corinne\u2026\u2026<\/p>\n